Keep Your Faith

3.44am, I don't know why I couldn't sleep at this point of time, but definitely not because of 2012 is coming. Just insomnia. So I decided to write about my feeling towards the 2011 me.

Family
I am a person that always love my family, no matter how it is, my family is the motivation of me making any decision since I'm young. I have a lovely dad, mom, elder brother and younger sister. 2011 had made me still realizing how important they are to me. They have shown their caring, passion, forgiveness, respect and LOVE to me and it really make me feels like : how I would be without any single one of you. If you ask me, they will always be my first priority at any point of time in my future. LOVE YOU !

Friends
I knew a lot, seriously a lot of friends in 2011. Through AIESEC mostly. And I've learnt terribly a lot from my friends around me because I can see various kind of personalities, is like pasar malam selling t-shirts. I cherish knowing more friends is because it could sometimes challenge me to solve problems, to listen, to motivate and to understand people more. Although it taught me hard lessons sometimes, but one thing I know is to see everything clearly because people have intention to do what they are doing.  You have to experience that lesson yourself to see the real side of that person. Of course I have good friends and vice versa, I have friends who I can share everything, but some just don't worth me sharing. I don't say that I'm good at analyzing people but I'm pretty sure that I'm good at observing. Why, because I wanted to people to treat me the same way I did to people, but I think I always get this wrongly. Anyhow, I just dislike people cheating on me. I found some. I couldn't blame them, they're just using you for their own good purpose. But despite of being dishonest, bad, dramatic to me, I'm really happy and thankful for learning so much from my friends around me. Don't listen to rumors !

AIESEC
It's been a roller coaster year for me being in AIESEC. I was elected as the Vice President of Outgoing Exchange Department on April where I have zero knowledge about that department. I have 3 lovely managers joined me after that where they were in that department for one year already. After we planned, we executed, we failed, we pressure, we go through ups and downs in this department till now. I could say that I'm proud of everyone of us along the journey I'm in this department. It really bring me up and the passion to continue my work in AIESEC. Ask me about anything in this department, I will be glad to answer you now.  And I have friends that supported me in AIESEC and  motivated me throughout the journey. names are secret AIESEC brings many joy and happiness for my university life here. I couldn't have imagine if I didn't come across this organization during my life here. Challenge more !

So this is the main 3 things I wanted to blog about before 2011 ends. I hope every bad thing will be staying here for the remaining time and the good one could be bring forward to 2012.

As for 2011 me, what else changes do you see on me?
As for 2012 you, do whatever you think it could bring you more !

- people can motivate you, but the most powerful one is yourself -

i didn't post anything emotional right yesterday? no i didn't. that is not emotional. is just a serious way of addressing my thoughts.

i decided to take effort and show my sincerity of what i'm gonna do. there is no use keep staying at the same ground blaming or depressing of why it happened. the best thing to sort things out is to listen to both side's opinion. i just knew one side's, but it doesn't matter for me anymore now. i'll take it as a motivation for me to reach what i'm aiming right now. at least.

i've heard some truth about something that i wouldn't even know if i didn't ask. so it's good to be curious, as curiosity kills a cat. but it didn't pull me down. i wonder sometimes people don't really see things very much detail that makes them, what word to use to describe the situation, got it, 'narrowed'. it narrow down your thoughts and vision about the thing it actually is and how you actually felt about it.

i might not be the best, but i'm working on it to be. what else can i say is : judge me and i'll prove you wrong.
that's no right or wrong of being this way, i value myself more than how people value me. i believe the world doesn't fall apart because of one, there are still many behind holding you up.

i may not dislike you, i just realized how you make me realized what action should i take. thank you #

I'm home for holiday which I'm supposed to study. Let's celebrate Christmas first. =)

to whom you're there reading this, one of my Christmas is to wish you "to believe yourself and not giving up, no matter in your studies or etc reasons that make you holding till now".

It's a short post to tell you I'm home.

I'm glad and excited because we "BOXX" performed quite well today at Kachi Fest (one of the event in my Uni). Everyone paid effort in it and bring a success to our performance. Well done everyone.

I'm going back to my hometown for few days due to MC Election (it's an election for member committee AIESEC in Malaysia) and I'm one of the representative from AIESEC in UUM. And of course LEAD Program by AIESEC in Malaysia as well. It's rather long to explain it here. =)

I'm relieved. I thought I couldn't handle it. I thought I'm not as good as I thought. I thought I will be going back the same like the year before this.

- i'm afraid to fail again until i met Perseverance and it made my day better -

Searching For Star 2011: I attended audition yesterday night. I sang Take A Bow - Rihanna. I have to perform it in front of many people while there are only 2 judges. =) They're only choosing 10 people to go for Semi-Final. So, I didn't put much hope in it. Because I love to do so.

Outgoing Exchange: Held a department meet yesterday. It's like finally I could express my feeling during the department meet. Because we hardly could get a full attendance. I talked and commented a lot about them. I hope this could really get them back and they will have passion towards OGX in the coming time. I'm happy for some of them that really put hard work for our department.

Stuff : Things are on track now. I hope everything could come out or a lil slight different as planned. I want to send people out ! DESPERATELY !

Heartache : My money. I'm attending MC + MCVPs Election, AMAN, MyLDS. These cost me a large amount of money.

Mood : I'm still happy because I can share everything, even my thoughts to people around me.

- you have the power to influence the people around you. How you want them to be? -

- what goes around, comes around. you contribute more, you gain more. that's it -